So, lately I've heard a few comments from people about hooping such as "Isn't it funny how you've been hooping longer than me and I'm already better at it?" or, "I've never gotten bruises from hooping, I just always was good at hooping" I never heard these comments on here just people in my community that hoop. I offered a girl to make her hoop because I love to make hoops and share hooping with as many people as I can and she said "Well my friends like a pro hooper so I would probably just have her tape the hoop" I started thinking why do I get these defensive responses from people? Maybe it's a girl thing because I get this with any thing not just hooping. If I like a certain band a girl says "Every one likes that band so I dont". Who cares? Everything doesnt have to be a competition. Ive heard girl's say about other girls hooping in public "Oh she's just showing off!" Why can't we all share the joy of hooping? Who cares how long you've been hooping, how much you practice, or where you are at in your hooping journey. My friend felt discouraged because she heard comments like this as well. I love hoopcity because every one on here is so positive and encouraging. I am constantly learning, I dont think I'll ever be done learning. I love being around hoopers and sharing what we love. I can learn stuff from a beginner or an advanced hooper. There's always so much to learn and explore. I just wondered if any one has ever felt this way. Some times I watch a video and it says they've only been hooping for a few months and I just am shocked at how good they are. It makes me want to practice more. Hooping shouldn't be a competition about who's better. I never saw this on hoopcity but just heard people say certain things and wondered if any one else has heard stuff like this.
I am sorry this is long, thanks for reading this whole rant if you took the time!
One thing I have found is, when looked for, one detractor can be replaced by a dozen supporters.
You're on the right site for the latter :o)
Friendly rivalry is loads better than competing, healthy, as it helps motivate you to do better at what you do and is good fun, as it has the element of 'here, let me show how to do what I just did' in it rather than 'haha, you can't dooooooo it' (apologies if you actually heard That Voice sayin' that ;)
Hmmm I don't like this kind of stuff either.
I get a lot of children saying "You're better than her" and I try and explain there is no "better" when we are just playing around.
I also hate when other hoopers complain (not quite the right word) about how I am better than them.
It makes me really uncomfortable and it makes me think they are missing a huge point.
When people are negative to you it usually is because of jealousy. Come up with a couple lines you can use in these situations. If someone said to me that it is funny that they are already better than me I would probably make a remark about becoming their modesty was.
When people say I am showing off, I usually give them a shit eating grin and say "damn straight". It is no use to explain how happy it makes me to these people. I don't put up with girls and their lack of confidence if they are going to push negativity on me.
"There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you."
I HAVE HAD THE SAME PROBLEM!! I'm kind of glad to find out I'm not the only one. So this is a very long story...
Whenever I had first started hooping, I met three girls at a local park who were super nice and showed me tricks. They were better than me, so they, of course, had more experience than me. Well a few months later, after I got very into hooping, I decided to start a Hoop Jam in my local community. By spreading the word through facebook, I was able to get in touch with the three girls I had met at this park. After sending a message, the one girl who had been hooping the longest, never messaged me back about coming out to a hoop jam session (even though they are totally free), but we remained friends on facebook. Anyways, a few weeks later I find out she's teaching a hooping class on Tuesdays. Since it was posted as her status, I asked her where the class was because I was interested in attending her class. I also added into a later post that hoopers should also come to my hoop jam on Mondays. The Hoop Jam and the hoop class were being held on completely separate days. The one I hold is free, and the one she holds costs money. Therefore when I mentioned my hoop jam on her facebook status, I wasn't taking anything away from her.
So, she de-friends me on good ole facebook. And I talked to this girl's friend about it (well, they were friends until the main girl got mad at her for supporting my hoop jam). Apparently this girl who I'm having issues with, felt that I was taking her spotlight. Word for word, she called it a "competition."
I COULD NOT BELIEVE THIS! :(
The whole reason I started a hoop jam in our community was to spread the joy and love of hooping. I wanted to find other hoopers, beginners or experienced, to hoop with. I think of hooping as an art form; it brings me so much joy and happiness and freedom. And I wanted (and still want), to share these magical feelings with others. I want them to know the freedom and joy that comes from the hoop. And when I found out about all of this drama (which I am not one for drama...I'm all about the peace, love, and happiness), I almost cried. Why would people ever let their egos get the best of them when it involves such a beautiful art form like hooping? I feel like this is the anti-representation of what we're supposed to be doing and finding in the hoop, and spreading with others. I want and wish so badly that she wouldn't feel this way. I even sent her a message on facebook telling her the reason I started the hoop jam (to spread the joy of hooping and to meet great people), and apologizing to her a million times for making her feel any sort of negative way. I was super nice. And guess what...she never even messaged me back. How sad.
And I know this is a one in a million example, because I've found so much love and support from fellow hoopers on HoopCity, but it just has to make you sad to know that this does still happen. It definitely upset and discouraged me.