Please help me hoop community. I need to get out of this hoop funk. I know this is a very long winded post, in part it is just for me to collect my thoughts...but if you have the time to skim and send some advice my way I would be so appreciative...

 I really want that zest back in my grasp, I want my art back. I want my love back. I know a lot of this is mirroring changes in my life, but I don't think loosing my art is the same as loosing relationships or jobs...its…

I dont know what is happening to me. I see these hoopers dancing with LED hoops at the clubs and its no longer interesting to me. I feel bored....when it used to be awe inspiring....am I growing cynical? growing away from the hoop? why am I judging other artists....I feel like a total asshole. 

I need some serious motivation. I am having the hoopers equvilent to writers block and have been for months. no bueno

First of all I want to write a disclaimer. This is me VENTING and isnt aimed at anyone at all, I am in a cynical mood and the tone of this isnt all roses and rainbows. I dont want to post this in the forums because I dont want anyone feeling attacked, so I suppose people can respond here if they want to.

Sometimes I get fed up with people that are obsessed with hooping. like people that are so hoopsessed enough to spell it that way, and  all i can talk to them about it that…

I lost my girlfriend, my best friend and soul mate. And I cant conceive of having a connection like that one with anyone else. I cant imagine starting over with anyone else. Every day is hellish now, my thoughts uncontrollably roll in. Things I never would have thought of before suddenly make me think of her, or that one time we did this or that. I tumble down a rabbit hole of self-pity and darkness, regret and self-blame. Rationally I know she did this because she knew it is unfair to keep…